My Rambles

Aashvi got up from her sleep sweating profusely. She had a glass of water from her bed-side table. Beads of perspiration glistened on her forehead in the moon light percolating from the window. ‘Not again’ She thought. It had been over 30 years and not a day had passed when she had not been awakened by this memory from her past.

Aashvi had worked as a house help as a child and toiled her way to where she was. Against all odds she not just acquired education, she reached the pinnacle and became a renowned scientist. A dream she had first envisaged, as a ten-year-old girl, when she happened to glimpse a cartoon on TV while sweeping the floor. She had grown into a tall, empathetic woman with large round curious eyes. The eyes which she ensured to hide behind her zero powered thick rimmed glasses, fearing her eyes to give away the darkness of her anguished soul.

The day had come for which she had worked towards most of her life. She got up and hurriedly went through the preparation for her two-hour journey…into her past. Despite innumerable failures over the years, she had not given up. She had worked hard and harder and eventually had tasted the sweet flavour of success. She had invented the time machine, another secret in her lonely life that she could not share with anyone. But this invention was just means to an end, not the end.

In her quest, there were many unknowns and things which could go wrong but there was no turning back now. She trembled and stepped into the time machine which was not very different from a jet cockpit. The blue touch screen glowed as if in anticipation. She sat crouched with a roll of orange nylon rope, took a deep breath and entered the coordinates, date, and time of the memory from her past.

Things swirled around her and within minutes she was lying in the woods. She slowly found her bearings and brushed her clothes. Her invention had not failed her. She had reached the right place though the place did look different from how she remembered. Everything was greener and even more picturesque from the eyes for 40 year old Aashvi. She hid behind the trees and saw her 30 years younger self, playing in her house courtyard, oblivious to the fact that her world would be turning upside-down in a short while. Aashvi had exactly two hours to correct her mistake in the past, two hours before she is automatically transported back to the present.

She had tested the time machine with smaller time differences so was not sure if she would time travel in her present self or her younger self. Thankfully she had come to the past as 40-year-old wise Aashvi, not the 8-year-old coward.

Her portly kind mother came out and chided her younger self- to stop playing and get ready for school. Tears started rolling down her eyes. She had forgotten how her mother looked like over the years, though was still comforted by her soft lullabies and loving hugs when she needed them most.

She could have stood there for hours but she had a task at hand and time was of paramount importance. She had to work with clockwork precision for the success of her operation. This was going to be difficult as the blueprint used was her memory of 8 year old self.

She rushed to the spot where the incident had taken place. It took her longer than she had budgeted to reach the location. She now had just about an hour now to build the fence and hide herself well in time.

The riverside which seemed to be littered then, now looked pristine and serene. A carpet of deep blue water surrounded by huge green trees and adorned by an orchestra of bird calls.

She started fencing the bank with the roll of nylon rope, the only trace of her visit she was planning to leave behind. She tethered the rope to the trees lining the river bank. She secured the rope with a firm knot at each tree to leave no margin for error. She covered around 250 m of the river bank and managed a 3 tiered fence to secure the bank. When she stepped back to look at her handy work, she realised that the orange nylon fence stuck out like an eyesore in otherwise untouched surroundings; she consoled herself, a necessary eyesore.

Everything was going as per the plan. It was almost time, so she went behind the woods on the other side of the path.

‘My foolish self along with her friend Gopi should be coming along any minute now.’ She thought.

There they were, carefree children playfully bantering and running along the bank. The leader teasing the laggard like a well-rehearsed ballet.
Younger Aashvi was ahead of Gopi and suddenly Gopi picked up the pace and tried to pass her. She reflexively tried to stop him and in the process, he lost his balance and toppled towards the river.

Exactly as it had happened 32 years ago and the way it had replayed in her dreams every day since then.

However this time, the wise Aashvi was smiling as she was prepared for it and had fenced the bank. As Gopi lost his balance and started falling towards the river, something happened, the rope fence though there, didn’t break his fall and Gopi rolled as if there was no fence. There was a loud splash followed by cries of help from both the kids.

Wiser Aashvi stood frozen at her spot, shocked and feeling foolish. She had tried to deceive nature but the past cannot be changed.

She saw the little girl running helter-skelter looking for help and when the girl could not find any help, the girl came back to the bank. On finding no trace of Gopi, the girl was devastated. She frantically looked around and when she couldn’t find Gopi, fearing wrath of the elders, she decided to run away from the village. That one decision had changed her life. From a secure loving home, she was shoved into the cruel world to fend for herself.

The day she had seen the time machine cartoon on TV, while sweeping the floor had changed her life again. She had got a purpose in her life and since then had spent every waking and sleeping hour working towards her goal.

The world saw her as a successful self-made woman but she was a tormented soul who had not slept peacefully for over 30 years now. To hide this secret, she always wore spectacles.

Aashvi saw the young girl walk away and her cries fade into oblivion. She was still rooted to her spot and when she was about to come out of her hiding place, she was thunderstruck, she saw Gopi climb the bank some distance down the stream. It looked like he had managed to get hold of a plank and had floated downstream with it and after flowing some distance had managed to save himself.

She had learned another lesson that day. Running away from the problems only makes them bigger. Two hours were over and she was back in her time machine laughing and crying simultaneously. Gopi had not died that day but she had lived her entire life alone in the agony of her guilt away from her parents and home.

She threw away her glasses, composed herself, freshened up, packed her bag, and left for her home in Rishikesh, hoping to reunite with her parents and Gopi.